Are you confused about your relationship? You can’t decide whether you guys are dating or they are just a friend with benefit? It is very common to be puzzled, as there is a thin wall between these two.
Sometimes people feel betrayed or hopeless when it comes to friends with benefits relations. As they don’t understand what the opposite one is feeling, is the relation serious, or only they are friends with benefit.
It’s very important to know the difference between dating and friends with benefits. I will clear out the signs of both and which one to choose. So you won’t feel any unrealistic expectations from them.
Is “Friends With Benefits” And “Dating” The Same Thing?
Friends with benefits, commonly known as FWB and dating is never the same thing. There might be similarities, but the differences are huge.
Dating is a serious relationship where commitment and attachment are a priority. You may or may not have courtship. It is not mandatory in dating.
On the other hand, FWB or just friends are two friends getting along for a while. There won’t be any commitment issues. Both of them agree to keep their friendship and sometimes take the benefits. This kind of a relation does include courtship.
Signs of Dating
You may be confused whether you are in a serious relationship (AKA dating) or it’s just a friend with benefits. I pointed out some crucial parts that are signs of dating-
- You see him/her as a long-time partner.
- Physical connection is not mandatory here, but most often, a mental connection is sought. You often explore each other, feel interested to know each other families and other stuff.
- You may set plans together, go on romantic dates and so on.
- You often discuss the future together.
- Future goals and jobs are often discussed together in dating.
- Most of the time, dating is exclusive. You may have more than one FWB at a time, but this rule doesn’t apply to dating.
- Commitment is a focal point here.
Signs Of Friends With Benefit
FWB is a friend of yours. You remain friends before and after the courtship. There are signs she/he is a friend with benefit, not someone you are dating-
- You have boundaries in FWB. You don’t share future goals or plans.
- Commitment is not needed here.
- Both of you can have sexual desires for each other, but you don’t take it any further.
- Any of you can end the FWB relation, and still be friends. Being in an FWB relation doesn’t indicate that you cant have future goals or find your significant other.
- You hang out like normal friends.
To be precise, the one you are dating may or not be your friend, but FWB relationships occur between friends with mutual understanding.
Dating Vs. Friends With Benefits: Comparison
Dating: Advantages and Disadvantages
There is a never-ending battle between dating and friends with benefits. People fight over which one is best, which one is ethical. But I’m not going into that. I will compare both of them, the benefits and problems these two hold.
Dating, as I said before, is somewhat a more serious thing. Of course, couples break up and find someone else, but I am saying what is considered traditional.
When two people decide to date, they are entering into a serious relationship, which they acknowledge. They try to understand and get to know each other.
They usually get together for a long term. Future goals and plans are often discussed together.
They not only talk about themselves but also get attached to their family members.
You may introduce the other one as your girlfriend/boyfriend in front of other people. Dating is publicly announced. Well, there are exceptions. Some people like to keep their serious relationships a secret.
Now the problem part, although it differs from person to person.
You cannot look for another person while being committed to one. That would be unethical, known as cheating.
Mutual understanding, staying true to your words are essential to make your relationship work. Commitment is a big issue for some people when it comes to dating.
Friends With Benefit: Advantage And Disadvantage
When it comes to the advantages, friends with benefits relations have plenty of them. But there are some problems too, which most people fear.
Friends with benefits occur between friends, so you know the other person better. You can hang out and chill, just like any other friendship. But the benefit here is you can have sexual desires for each other.
But the most exciting benefit is no commitment. Some people are afraid of commitment. You may have an FWB ongoing and still get into another FWB, there won’t be an issue for you, and this will not count as cheating.
You don’t have any strings with your friends with benefit. You don’t have to further take up your relationship in the future and can leave any moment you want. There is no drama or explanation needed. However, you are only ending the benefits part. You can still be friends.
Your future goals and plans don’t include your FWB, as settling down goes against the rules of friends with benefits relationships. But you can discuss these topics with them, as you are friends.
The most common disadvantage of friends with benefits relations is getting attached to the other person. The worst is, the other person doesn’t feel the same way. As you accepted the boundaries of FWB relationships, you cannot blame, nor can you force them to upgrade the relation.
Other than this heartbroken situation, there is a risk of sexually transmitted disease in FWB relations. As you don’t stay monogamous in FWB, there is a high risk of AIDS or any other STD.
Relationship Or Friends With Benefits? Which One To Choose
It depends on you. What are you seeking in a relationship? Is it stability, commitment and trust? Or do you want to be with someone for a while?
Dating requires patience and maturity. You cannot leave anytime you want, as you have committed to the other person. There is also an exploration part, where you get to know each other. You have to respect each other and the decisions they make.
There is mainly mental satisfaction, finding someone for the rest of your life. If you are a person who likes a monogamous relationship, then dating would be the best option.
Friends with benefits are temporary. You cannot expect the other person to stay forever. As there is no commitment and lots of boundaries, not all people prefer FWB relationships.
Call it business or not, FWB relationships are popular because of their temporary time limit. Many people don’t like break-up drama, nor do they like monogamous relationships. For them, friends with benefits is a good option.
Every human being is different. They have a different perspective on romantic interest. Some like to be in a life-long relationship. Some prefer a fling, like FWB. Both of the types have their issues and advantages. Now that you know the differences between dating and friends with benefits, it’s easier for you to differentiate and choose yours wisely.
What are the problems in the Friends with benefits relationship?
Ans: Friends with benefits can develop feelings later, which causes heartbreak and sometimes the friendship gets ruined. There is also a high chance of STD.
How do I avoid getting attached to a friend with benefits relationship?
Ans: Having clear boundaries and rules before entering into an FWB relationship can help you avoid attachment. You can also let yourself be busy with something else.
How long can a friends with benefits relationship last?
Ans: Friends with benefits relationships can last from one month to several years. It depends on you and the other person.
What are the signs that a guy with whom you’re in an FWB situation is falling for you?
Ans: Usually, there is no romantic interest in an FWB relation. But if an FWB is falling for you, they might act like a boyfriend/girlfriend. They want to be with you more often. They don’t fear going public with you and many more. It is best to ask them directly.