Did your lover break up with you because you are needy? And you know that. You were utterly dependent on them, constantly being clingy.
If you are trying to getting them back, I’m sure you searched on the internet and found the No contact strategy, which means to stop any contact( calls and messages) with your ex.
Of course, the love gurus are swearing by this strategy. But, you wonder, does this no contact rule apply to you when you were the needy one in the relationship?
So I will discuss in which cases the no contact rule works and how to perform it after being needy.
Will No Contact Work If You Were Needy And Begged For Them Some Days Earlier?
The no-contact rule is simple. You have to stop all kinds of contact with the one you broke up with. You don’t send text messages or call him/her late at night when you are missing the person.
But if you are used to giving constant attention to the person and thinking it will look fake when you stop contacting them, you are mistaken here.
The contact strategy will work, even if you were needy. But take a slightly different approach.
You have to show them you are well off without them. And how to do that? By truly realizing this.
You are not dependent on your lover. You are only thinking you are, which is making the process worse. Don’t take no contact as a strategy; instead, use it to reserve your self-esteem.
I know it’s tough to do, as you are so emotionally available for them all the time. Rather than getting your ex back, make yourself the priority.
There are chances that if you are thinking of yourself as a needy and clingy person who bothers everyone, your lover made you feel like this. In a toxic relationship, one person always tries to blame the other, making them think lowly of themselves.
If your case is something like this, reconsider getting back to your ex. Do you also crave attention from your friends and family? Or it’s the only person, your ex?
But if you know, you are truly a needy person, not only with your ex but also with friends. Then you can apply the no contact rule. See how your ex reacts.
However, please don’t rely on them. Sure, you want your ex back, they are irresistible, and so on, but making them the top priority during the no contact session will take your peace away.
Will Your Ex Come Back After No Contact?
There is no guarantee. It also depends a lot on why they broke up with you. If the reason is significant, such as you slept with her friend, then no contact is not going to work. However, if she broke up with you because you were constantly demanding attention, in another way, you were clingy, then no contact strategy will work.
There can be two outcomes in this process. Either your ex feels attracted to you after seeing your development, or they don’t care and will forget you forever.
Both options are good for you. Not contacting will improve your mindset, and you will find life other than being obsessed with your ex.
No Contact Rule Tips, Especially For Needy People
Being the needy one in a relationship is very tough. You have constant anxiousness going on, and no one in the world except you can feel this.
For some people, not contacting their ex is nearly impossible. They cant follow the no contact rules well. As a result, they don’t gain their objective.
I will share some tips on following the no contact rule that got my ex back.
Don’t Give All The Focus To Your Ex.
You have to get this. They are now your ex. No matter what you do, the chances of not getting them back can be zero. So if you play the famous “No contact” strategy only for the sake of your ex, it isn’t healthy for you.
Have a life of your own. You had hobbies and skills which you neglected in the relationship. The first and foremost mistake needy people make in a relationship is to prioritize the other person.
By doing this, you are announcing how needy you are, making your lover very uncomfortable. They think you are weak and don’t have a life.
Trust me, no woman or man likes a person who doesn’t have ambition for their life.
So try to learn a new skill. Or sharpen the talent you had before. In this way, you will not want your ex back as severely as before. Your ex may even be surprised by how attractive you can be.
Don’t Isolate Yourself
We often mistake the idea of no contact. It means you will not initiate a conversation with your ex. And not run away or confine yourself in a room to avoid them.
If your ex tries to reach out to you, don’t walk away. Instead, keep the conversation minimal and in a friendly tone. Don’t even think of begging to get back together.
Make Yourself Improved And Visible
When your ex sees you are better without them, they will rethink you aren’t the faulty one. You have other business other than them. And indeed, they will think more about you.
You can post more often on social media, of course, not heartbreak statuses, but the success you hold. If you guys broke up because of your personality flaws, there is a high chance they will try to get back to you.
Having self-respect is very important in any relationship. When you are showing your dependence, your self-esteem is being vulnerable. Sure, you have to rely on each other to some extent. Mutual reliance is needed in any relationship. Just make sure you aren’t so focused on your love life that you forget that you have a life of your own.